A Collection of Poems

This is the rest of my collection of poems from over the years. I'm not doing very much with them so I decided to post them so at least they can be read and maybe appreciated for what they are. Please don't be a dick and leave rude comments. Be mature and have some respect.



DEPENDANT

The most beautiful thing that I've ever seen
Being ripped apart at the seams
You can't walk in a straight line
Because of your unique design
Or so that’s what you like to think
Generations apart
You still inherit his heart
And the leftovers in between
You lie to yourself
Until you can find a way out
But this well is far too steep
Eyes looking sour
Each line must cross another
Every card must be put in place
You open your mouth
The words fall on the ground
He picks up one and stirs it in
And drinks in a reflection of you
Never quite knowing the truth
It's an argument far too complex
And it seems easier just to lose

MANIPULATED GIRL

You hurt me before and you'll do it again
My surface is white
But my body is tired
The bruises rest in my head
You made me feel loved
You made me believe
That I was better than what I really am
You wrapped me up
Cradled me whole
Just to smoke me for all that I am
I should have known better
I should have realized
That this was all part of your plan

Now I'm playing the part
That you want me to
You hold me on your knee
Your words spill out of my razor mouth
You wave my hand
And force me to smile
They cannot see
They cannot recognise me
Under the disguise you created
I can't move the mask
Without piercing the flesh
It's stuck on too tight
With copper nails and a wire band

My eyes are uncovered
You want me to see
The way you are looking at me
They're the one thing that scares you
Makes you feel numb
So you glaze them over one by one
There is nothing left in the end
Now that I stand
With blood on my hands
You better move on to the next
It comes to a point
So broken inside
I completely forget who I am

WEAK

Such a scattered mind
Cannot seem to compromise
The beauty I seek
Whirls in like a child's dream
For once in my life
I am finally free
A pale reality
False sense of security
I fall into disarray
And once again
I am trapped in the enemy’s game
An attraction I cannot explain
The twisted thrill I crave
Weary heads turn away

WAITING

The slightest bit of reason you hold
to feel something so strong
yet not feel it at all
The burn that fills up the once empty spot
where innocence was lost
where a child once lay
The child is gone
And the memory drowned
It's everything you want
But somehow not good enough
The selfish fool you are
to keep wasting your breath
to ignore the facts
Temptation is awaiting
These flesh covered creatures
An odd but amusing representation
The light, the dark, and the child
They laugh because they know
you are one step behind
But it's almost so clear now
The haunting thought that lingers
Like a scab that just won't heal
The constant waiting
It thrills you like nothing else
This is what scares you most
But this is all part of the plan
You wait
And in the end
There is nothing at all

UNTITLED

Always something to prove
Nothing good enough
I am what I am
And it is how it is
I see my fault
I see my strength
This is me
Accept it
I'm frustrated
Misunderstood
By the person who should know me best
He only sees a child of 12
Not one who has grown and wandered
Beyond his comprehension
Gained and lost
Only one who is small and uncertain
Insecure and timid
I'm sorry for my stubborn ways
I don't see the need to change
I'm not a doctor
I'm not a model
But I have a dream
Don't knock it down
Don't laugh in my face
I will do it
I don't need you
Even then, it won't be enough
There's always something
Just because your life didn't work out
Doesn't mean I will be the same
I'm not like you
And I'm not like her
But I'm glad
This is where I fit
It's not perfect
But nothing is
I have emotions
Sometimes anger
Maybe even sadness or doubt
Or uncertainty
I am only human
Just let me have that
Don't scrutinize me
Just let me live

LONELY TRAVELLER

It's a long way to get back to where I came from
I walk on and still can't find where I belong
And all my hope is left in you
I've been so many places
I've seen so many faces
That I don't even know which one is my own
Why do we wander so?
But never know just quite where were going to
I guess my faith is left in you
I want to quit so bad
and go back to what I once had
but then I'll never know
what I am really here for
I've got little money
and I don't got no friends
This long lonely journey
feels like it will never end
God I miss my mother
and I miss the rain
but before I know it
I'll be back in that spot once again
Everyday I wake up
there's something new to fuck up
another desire, temptation
another soulless connection
and under my own deception
another day of rejection
Can I please have your attention?
Where is MY damn redemption?
Another day, another deed
and still I beg and I plead
but every morning I rise
to open brand new eyes
I find new reason to shine
So much beauty surrounds me
and this love astounds me
A joy I can't describe
and this is why
my trust is left in you

A PRAYER

What have I done
I have hurt myself again
I have fallen countless times
The numbers turn to mush
Once this yearning has captured me,
there is no escape
You have paid the price of my fault
and I am in debt to you
I want to be with you
loving you
trusting you
Once again I put on my armour
and put up this feeble wall,
I can't see you because I choose to ignore
Yet you still peer in through the tiny cracks
whispering so softly
The sound cuts me like a knife
Too unique to drown out
My weakness is now visible
and I have no where left to hide
This fence of chiffon and lace
cannot shield this tainted skin
and once again I am destitute
longing for only you
knowing that soon I will plunge
into the sea of greed and desire
building my defence
to lock you out
Am I only locking myself in?

THE WRONG REASON TO LOVE

What's the crime
What's the word on the street
Is it time for a change
or time to stay the same?
What do we know
about this crooked crown on my head?
it won't tell you much
and it'll terrify you
when you really learn
I've got a pocket full of puzzle pieces
packed and pushed to fit together
Really that’s the best I can do
But once I’m steady
I'll be ready
to love


A TIME-WORN HOUSE

A time-worn house
refined, transformed
over and over
Once bright-
an artificial attraction
A material wasteland
and then dark and somber
Hidden and forgotten
empty inside
The latest transition-
a simple white
so elegant, beautiful
Through the cracks
light shines through
Just enough to discern
one room
scattered and unkempt
walls stained
Poison slowly fills the air
undetected
There is chaos within

A MOMENT

Hold on to this moment
For it will never come again
There will be other moments
But never one just like this
Hold on to this moment
It will end before you know it
Soon it will dissapear
Into the past
Hold on to this moment
And never forget it
Keep it close
Never let it fade
Hold on to this moment
For this is life
A series of moments
Each one unique
Hold on to this moment
For it could be you last
Life is too short
For a moment to be wasted

TIME MACHINE

A journey through my childhood
to a time when I was truly happy
All i needed was nothing at all

Help me find my way out
I've come to terms with myself
Don't get ahead of your mind
Feel the aching inside
Nothing is ever easy
When everything you own is lost
Bring me down
From this cloud on the ground
Dirty, dark and destitute
I've made my way here
With no plans to return back home

But
There is safety in the dark
There is comfort in pain
There is love in betrayel
And there is hope down here

I don't like what I've become
Satisfaction has a price
What have I done to myself
And to those I love
I had an image of a girl
Now everything is in it's place
Just as I had planned
But when it all falls apart
You just don't realize what you had
And you want to turn back

But
There is safety in the dark
There is comfort in pain
There is love in betrayel
And there is hope in me

I will make you believe
Just listen to me
I can make you feel alright
I can bring you to your knees
I'm the only one you have

So you better be good to me

And there is strength in being wrong
There is peace when your alone
There is freedom in a lie

No matter what the cost
Believe in what you want
There is no hope down here